This is in Hertford, I drop Phoebe off at my parents and walk to the session, just a short 5 minute walk pushing my boy in the pram. We are early and the building is shut, so we walk round to see the ducks. I cannot restrain myself while watching my boy chat to the… Continue reading First Physiotherapy appointment

Coping is a word I’ve never really known the meaning of before – but by god that’s all we could do. Hiding your grief for something / someone that’s not even gone, but grieving the future is unexplainable. Is it my fault, do I carry this gene? Why him? Don’t tell me he was chosen… Continue reading 4-6 weeks pass

That first month consisted of no sleep, crying uncontrollably, feeling so helpless and responsible for causing this to my boy. Grieving. True friends started to show, whether a call, many texts, dragging me for a drink, listening, trying to understand. Thank you. I honestly don’t know how we got through this month, if I can… Continue reading Month 1 & our house move

28th January 2016 GOSH – Our first visit Lunch at Giraffe with some of our family – it’s my Dad (Grandpa’s 70th Birthday). Feeling very sick but trying to hide it from everyone. Am sure they all feel the same inside. We arrive to a pretty unwelcoming lobby area (not the GOSH you see on… Continue reading A very long day, a very sad day, a very shocking day